The minute she was born I helped pull her out. Clean her up. Dry her off. Saw her 1st yawn. I bottle fed her until she was weaned. I made the kitten formula myself. Butler is named after Clark Gable from Gone With the Wind as Rhett Butler.
Butler since second one was always at my side we never were apart. Or I should say she was on my shoulder. [ Her favorite place]
Our favorite activity was hang gliding. She adored it. Just us 2 in the air. No worries. Only me talking to her and her kissing my face.
She loved my motorcycle too. I bought her goggles and a small leather jacket. She rode in front of me in a baby carrier made of denim. Hissing at red lights at anyone that came too close.
Every night she lay her chin on my head and one paw upon my shoulder. In the mornings she wake me by tapping my face. I would get up and she stoically wait at her dish for breakfast.
As I would take my showers she sit outside the bathroom door watching over me.
If company came by she fly to the door, arch and hiss. Always on duty.
She was indoors only but she come outside as I did lawn work. Sitting up on the porch facing whatever direction I was. Always watching to make sure nobody hurt me.
On camping trips she was known to chase off raccoons. With me following her saying "Butler have you lost your mind?" Butler knew no fear even though she weighed only 4 1/2 pounds.
I have no family they are all deceased. Butler was and is my family.
When I was told I had cancer it was Butler who took care of me. Guarded me. Nursed me. Saved me.
She stay at my head through the good, bad, the pain cleaning my head and wrapping one paw in my hand. Telling me "it's ok Mom I am here".
As Butler aged she lost her sight. The use of her back legs. She survived 3 strokes. It did not slow her down. She bound off the sofa to get a drink, follow me whatever she wanted she went.
Two nights before she left me she had stopped breathing I gave her mouth to mouth she came back to me. Kissing, kissing my face.
March 28th 2008 she no longer could fight. She passed away in my arms. I can not talk about it still. That day my soul left with her. I am a shell stumbling through life now.
I never thought about Butler leaving me. It never dawned on me she ever would.
She fought as hard as any warrior to stay with me as I fought hard to stay with her. Now it's just me. I am still going through chemo she goes with me again wrapped in her blanket. I only wish she could hold my hand again. But she is still comforting me as she did in life.
I had Butler's body freeze dried. To some it maybe odd. To me it's love. To not have Butler at all be unbearable. Anthony Eddy's did a wonderful job. She looks asleep.
It's been 5 years. The heartache has not eased at all. I can stroke her fur, see her face but my soul needs her up and about.
Words fail me on what Butler meant to me...everything.
I only hope she knew she was my world. I hope I served her well. If she was happy? Then I did my job as her Mom.
I painted a room black and white in her honor I think she'd like that.
Butler I love you. I miss you terribly. I hope I served you well. What you gave me can not be replaced or even copied. The house is quiet without you. As is my hearbeat. I love you Sweet Pea.