SIOUX TRIBE POUCH WITH A LOCK OF TIPPY'S HAIR INSIDE

TIPPY AND I WERE IN MONTANA AT THE CROW FAIR AND RODEO AND I WENT INTO A TINY ANTIQUE STORE. THE FIRST THING I SAW WAS THE POUCH. I KNEW WHEN I SAW IT, THAT I 'NEEDED' IT. I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND WHY I WAS SO DRAWN TO IT BUT I KNEW I WAS GOING TO BUY IT.

THE POUCH HAS BEEN WRAPPED IN TISSUE PAPER FOR 21 YEARS. I WAS GOING THROUGH BOXES OF SMALL ANTIQUES AND FOUND IT. TONIGHT I KNEW WHY I BOUGHT IT ON THAT TRIP WITH TIPPY. I TOOK THE LOCK OF OF HIS HAIR THAT I'VE HAD SO MANY YEARS AND PUT IT IN THE POUCH.

THINGS ARE BETTER IN MY HEART NOW. TIPPY, YOU WILL GO WHEREVER I GO. A PART OF YOU WILL ALWAYS BE WITH ME.

BACK OF THE POUCH

OVER THE YEARS I HAVE LEARNED TO IDENTIFY THE BEADWORK OF DIFFERENT TRIBES. I TAUGHT MYSELF TO BEAD ON LOOMS AT NIGHT AFTER THE RODEOS. I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BEST BEADS TO BUY AND I DECIDED TO BUY SOME AND USE THEM.  LOOM BEADWORK IS TEDIOUS AND YOU COULD NEVER BE PAID THE WORTH OF THE LABOR IN A PIECE OF WORK.

I KNOW THIS IS A SIOUX POUCH BECAUSE OF THE DESIGN LAYOUT. THE SIOUX USED GEOMETRIC SHAPES IN THEIR PIECES. THEY ALSO USED A SPECIFIC BEAD SIZE. I DON'T HAVE THE POUCH LAYING BY THE COMPUTER NOW BUT I BELIEVE THIS IS A SIZE 15 OR SMALLER BEAD. THE SMALLER THE BEAD, THE HARDER IT IS TO WORK WITH AND THE MORE VALUABLE THE PIECE IS.  THIS POUCH IS MORE THAN LIKELY MADE FROM DEER HIDE THAT WAS STRETCHED AND TANNED BY THE PERSON WHO DID THE BEADING.  IT IS PROBABLY ABOUT 90 YEARS OLD.

TIP'S LOCK OF HAIR IS IN A VERY SPECIAL PLACE TONIGHT AND FOREVER. I AM GOING TO BE CREMATED AND WILL MAKE ARRANGEMENTS TO HAVE THE POUCH WITH ME.

TIPPPY IN 1989 AT A PHOTOGRAPHY WORKSHOP IN PILAR, NM

MANY, MANY YEARS AGO WHEN PATTI LABELLE DIED, MY DAUGHTER WENT TO A PSYCHIC AND THE LADY TOLD HER THAT BELLE WOULD COME BACK IN ANOTHER DOG ONE DAY. I'VE NEVER FORGOTTEN THAT. I COULD SEE THAT TOOTER (SCOTTIE) CAME BACK IN J.J. (BENJI TYPE) BECAUSE OF HIS SILLY PERSONALITY. HENRIETTA CAME BACK IN FAYEROE. HER GUARDING ME AND NO HOLDS BARRED WHEN SOMEONE TRIED TO BREAK INTO MY HOUSE THROUGH A KITCHEN WINDOW WAS TOTALLY HENRI..WHEN HENRI AND I FOUGHT THE BOAR RACCOON, HE HAD HENRI BY THE THROAT AND I FINALLY  I GOT HIM OFF HER , BY BEATING HIM WITH A 'MAG' LIGHT, BUT NOT BEFORE HE BIT THE TIP OF HER EAR OFF. FAYEROE WAS STABBED 4 TIMES BY THE ROBBERS BUT DIDN'T QUIT. PURE HENRIETTA.

I'VE WONDERED IF TIP WOULD EVER COME BACK TO ME IN ANOTHER DOG. I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN VERY ATTENTIVE TO THAT POSSIBILITY. TWO DAYS AGO, I SAW TIPPY IN CLEMENTINE. TIPPY WAS HALF AIREDALE. CLEM IS HALF AIREDALE. SHE WALKS LIKE HIM. SHE LAYS HER PAW ON ME LIKE HE DID. UP ON MY SHOULDER WHEN WE SIT TOGETHER. SHE WAGS HER TAIL LIKE HE DID. SHE KNOWS THAT WE'RE SECURE TOGETHER. SHE 'GETS' IT.

A PART OF MISTER TIP IS BACK.

OUR LADY OF GUADALUPE

You are so beautiful
To me
You are so beautiful
To me
Can't you see

You're everything I hope for
You're everything I need
You are so beautiful to me
You are so beautiful to me

You are so beautiful
To me
Can't you see
You're everything I hope for
You're every, everything I need
You are so beautiful to me
---
"You Are So Beautiful" as written by Bruce Fisher, Billy Preston, Joachim Gottschalk

I COULD NOT HAVE DONE IT, HAD IT NOT BEEN FOR TIPPY BEING BY MY SIDE, ALWAYS.

I KNEW ALL ALONG THAT TIPPY WOULD GO FIRST.

I WAS ABLE TO HOLD OFF THINKING ABOUT IT FOR ABOUT 13-1/2 YEARS. HE STARTED SLOWING DOWN. HIS EYES GREW BLUER AND HE SLEPT MORE. HE STILL 'CAVORTED' WITH ME BUT IT WAS IN A VERY OLD MAN WAY. HE TOOK DELIGHT IN WADING IN THE CREEKS AND STANDING UP TO HIS NECK IN THE WATER.

KNOWING IT AND EXPERIENCING IT ARE TWO ENTIRELY DIFFERENT EMOTIONS. I'LL NEVER FORGET SITTING IN THE BATHTUB SCREAMING AS LOUD AS I COULD, THE MORNING OF HIS LAST DAY. THE HOT SCALDING TEARS THAT COVERED MY FACE AND DRIPPED DOWN  BURNED BUT IT WAS NOTHING LIKE THE PAIN IN MY HEART AND SOUL. . I BEAT THE SIDES OF THE BATHTUB AND SCREAMED 'WHY, WHY, WHY TIP?"  I'LL GO IN HIS PLACE!

ON THE ETERNALLY LONG DRIVE TO THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE, I TALKED TO HIM THE ENTIRE WAY. I TOLD HIM HOW MUCH I LOVED HIM (HE ALWAYS LAID HIS EARS DOWN WHEN I SAID "I LOVE YOU'. I TOLD HIM HOW SAFE I ALWAYS FELT WITH HIM EMOTIONALLY. I KNEW THAT HE WOULD NEVER BETRAY ME. I TOLD HIM HOW HARD IT WAS TO DRIVE THE TRUCK ANOTHER MILE BECAUSE I WANTED TO TURN AROUND AND GO BACK TO THINGS THE WAY THEY WERE WHEN HE WAS YOUNG.

IT DIDN'T MATTER WHAT I TOLD HIM. WE DROVE UP TO THE BACK OF THE CLINIC AND THE DOCTOR CAME OUT TO THE TRUCK. COLLEEN, CONNIE AND I SANG HIS SONG.

Frère Jacques, Frère Jacques,
Dormez-vous? Dormez-vous?
Sonnez les matines! Sonnez les matines!
Din, dan, don. Din, dan, don.

Brother Jacob, Brother Jacob,
Are you sleeping? Are you sleeping?
Morning bells are ringing! Mornings bells are ringing!
Ding, dang, dong. Ding, dang, dong.

ALL OUR DOGS HAD 'THEIR' SONG. WE TOOK THEIR NAMES AND ADAPTED THEM TO THE TUNE AND REPEATED THEIR NAMES THROUGH OUT. WHEN I WOULD SING TIP'S SONG TO HIM, HE WOULD ALWAYS GET THIS CERTAIN LOOK ON HIS FACE. A LOOK OF SATISFACTION AND HAPPINESS.

COLLEEN DROVE HIM BACK HOME BECAUSE I COULDN'T DO IT. I RODE WITH CONNIE.   MY SISTERS CAME FOR HIS FUNERAL  THAT AFTERNOON. EVERYONE HAD PREPARED A PIECE TO SAY FOR TIPPY. EACH MEMBER OF THE FAMILY HAD VERY SPECIFIC MEMORIES THAT THEY TALKED ABOUT. IT WAS A VERY SPECIAL LEAVE-TAKING.

WHEN I WENT TO BED THAT NIGHT, I'VE NEVER BEEN LONELIER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. MY FIRST NIGHT WITHOUT MY MISTER TIP, MY FUZZY TIPPY, MY TIP, MY TIPPY...GONE, FOREVER.